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So TheMonk and Swee’Pea were plopped in their crib
With matching onesies and an “I (heart) Grandma” bib
They were sleepy and tired without much to say
Between sleeping, eating and pooping all day

It soon became apparent, the two weren’t the same
TheMonk was the wild one while Swee’Pea was quite tame
TheMonk would greet you with a growl and a grunt
While Swee’Pea had the cry of a cute little runt

It soon became clear that two babies weren’t easy
And it’s not just the diapers making them queasy
No time to sleep, no time to rest
Who knew parenthood could be such a test

Meanwhile, Mom and Dad, were they in this too deep
Or did it just seem that way with so little sleep
They weren’t outnumbered, they matched up one-on-one
But if you’re keeping score, you knew they were done

And in the beginning the babies fed from a tube
That came along side a finger, and not from the boob
It took hours and hours to finish the feed
Making Mom and Dad question, “Why did we breed!”

Finally, they couldn’t take it no more!
So they called in a consultant who came to their door.
She examined them carefully without any luck
Until she exclaimed, “These babies can’t suck!”

No wonder it’s taken them so long to eat
They just aren’t that good when put to the teat
But using these bottles will give them more power
Soon you’ll feed by the minute instead of the hour!

With this small change, everything seemed so right
The mood of the house changed from darkness to light
Mommy & Daddy could now sleep in ’til noon
(And if you believe that, I’d like to sell you the moon)

Now eight weeks have passed since the babies’ birth day
So they coo and they smile and react well to play
TheMonk eats well, he’s as big as a house
While Swee’Pea is smaller, like a little field mouse

Mommy and Daddy have adjusted well too
And the house seems less and less like a zoo
The only one who would dispute any of that
Would be poor, neglected Nutmeg the cat

Now Mom and Dad have experience under their belt
And the babies are still making loving hearts melt
There’ll be more to this story so stop by and see
Another installment of the Adventures of TheMonk and Bri