Today is a holiday, here in California, that honors the legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Last year I wrote a post on the significance of this day as I was preparing to enter parenthood for the first time. I won’t duplicate what I wrote last year, but I will say that I think about the opportunities my children have, as mixed-race children, that those that came before them did not have. I am thankful we have come so far as a nation. I am grateful for people like Dr. King and Cesar Chavez (who we will honor later this year) that fought so hard for the rights of those who came before me and came before my children.

However, I am also cognizant of the fact that we have so far to go. I recognize barriers are still being broken almost four decades after Dr. King was murdered. Just this year, Columbia University – my alma mater, hired a football coach. This is nothing new considering the futility of the Columbia football team over the years, however the significance of this hire was that this new football coach happens to be black. On December 12, 2005 Columbia hired Norries Wilson, the first African-American head football coach in the seventy year history of the Ivy League. I am proud that an institution that I hold near and dear did what was right – and was a long time in coming. But my hope is that one day, TheMonk and Swee’Pea can grow up in a society that no longer celebrates “firsts” of any cultural or ethnic group joining the “mainstream”. Instead, wouldn’t it be great that the routine hiring of a football coach was just that – routine.

So, as we move forward, I think it’s important to remember the message Dr. King delivered on August 28, 1963. Dr. King had a dream “that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.”‘

Please take a moment out of your day to consider our great nation and how much has changed since Dr. King uttered these words. But also take a moment to reflect on how much further we have to go.

You can read the entire “I Have a Dream” speech here.

My blogroll was getting rather cumbersome. So, I’ve put my blogroll on separate pages on the right. I’ve got Daddy Blogs, Mommy Blogs, and Twin Blogs – check them out at your leisure.

However, I didn’t want to totally do away with a blogroll on my front page – so I have created a “Blogs of the Month” category. I haven’t really thought this out too far into the future but I figure I’ll put a handful of blogs up there each month that I’ve enjoyed reading that month. To start this feature off I have included all the bloggers that “De-Lurked” here this week at Childsplayx2. Since they were so kind to leave a comment, it was the least I could do.

Happy Blogging!

I’m a very competitive person. I once dove for the finish line in a 200 meter race and broke (and dislocated) my wrist (I won the race though). Two weeks later I was competing in a full arm cast. I wasn’t about to let a little broken bone keep me from competing.

Well, here in blog land there isn’t much competing. We all visit those sites in our blogosphere neighborhood, leave a nice comment or two, and move on. I was perfectly happy to be doing my thing, writing about the humor and love I have for TheMonk and Swee’Pea, when Dutch, Aginoth and Juggling Mother honored me by nominating me for Best Daddy Blog at the BoBs (The Best of Blogs).

Now, I was very honored that these people felt compelled to nominate me. But, boy, did it stoke some competitive fires in me! Well, to make a long story short, I did not make it as a finalist. I was going to write some “teachable moment” post to TheMonk and Swee’Pea about handling disappointment but that would be a bunch of crap. So, no post.

But then I did get to thinking that some great bloggers who happen to be on my blogroll, who I happen to correspond with fairly regularly, did make it as a finalist. So, I thought, maybe I should put aside the disappointment and cheer on my fellow teammates.

So, I’m going to start campaigning for my fellow bloggers. I hope you’ll vote for the following wonderful bloggers.

New Blog of the Year
Can there really be any other choice than Sweet Juniper? This husband/wife team is so creative and fun to read that one wouldn’t know that this is a “new” blog. Besides, Juniper is so frickin’ cute it’s scary.

Best Daddy Blog
Now, three blogs that are on my blogroll are finalists. Dadcentric, Shotgun Daddy, and Cynical Dad. Out of the three, Chag at Cynical Dad is the only one who consistently tells me how cute my kids are. So, if I couldn’t make it then I want Chag to win. He claims he just wants enough votes to not be last. I think we can do better.

Best Mommy Blog
This was a tough one for me. Both finalists that are on my current blogroll are dear to me in different ways. Morphing Into Mama actually sent me and my wife a Christmas gift this year. How cool is that? Plus, she didn’t win for high school class president so I figure she’s due. Friday Playdate, on the other hand, has always been a great commenter on my site. So, it’s a toss-up and I’m going to vote for them both.

So, that’s my trumping for the candidates. Go and visit the other blogs who were finalists as I’m sure they’re all deserving. Remember, vote early and vote often.

(Feel free to use the graphics above for campaigning purposes)

I have a confession to make. I like comments.

Okay, okay. You’re right. I’m not being totally honest here. I love comments. Love ‘em. It’s like Christmas morning every time I see that someone left me a comment.

This is as good a time as any to bring this up since Cheryl has declared this “De-Lurking Week“. Now over the past several months I have noticed that more and more people are visiting my little corner of cyberspace. I am flattered that you find what I write here interesting enough to stop by once in a while. It probably doesn’t hurt that the kids are really cute.

I am soooo curious. Why do you keep visiting? Where are you visiting from? What’s your favorite cartoon character? What’s your most embarrassing moment? Tell me anything!

So, please, do a guy a favor and leave me a comment. I really don’t have anything to give you (Andrea is certain to nix the “give a baby away” promotion) but this parting gift. Leave a comment and you can advertise on your blog (if you happen to have one) that you celebrated de-lurking week here at Childsplayx2.com.

The comment line is now open! Let me hear from you!

TheMonk and Bri,

I almost missed bananas today.

You see, we’re slowly introducing new solids to you every few days. You’re not too far into this “eating solids” thing so each new experience is fun to watch. So far you’ve tried rice cereal, oatmeal and squash. Tonight, it was bananas.

I love watching the first bite. That first bite of each new food triggers facial expressions that seem to show how your brain is processing each new flavor and texture. You will then look up at me or your mother and we make eye contact. We nod and smile, encouraging you to accept this new food as something good. As your little lips smack and inevitably food oozes out of your tiny mouth you decide that you like it. You may smile or open your mouth instinctively for more. You two are little adventurers and each new food is an adventure to savor.

And tonight it was bananas. My work was a little hectic today and I left 15 minutes later than I know I have to if I’m going to make it in time to feed you. My commute is 35 minutes if traffic is good, 40 minutes if traffic is normal, and 45 to 50 minutes if traffic is bad. I hoped for good traffic today. I didn’t get it. Soon enough, I got a call from your mommy. “It’s time to feed them. How far away are you?” She asked. I looked where I was on the freeway, surrounded by cars. “About 15 minutes.” I replied. “Do you want me to feed them squash instead?” Your mommy asked, as I was unable to hide my disappointment at missing your feeding. I wanted to say “Yes.” I wanted to wait until tomorrow to see that first bite of banana. But then I realized there’s no guarantee I would make it home tomorrow night in time, either. “No…” I sighed, “go ahead and feed them bananas. I’ll be home as soon as I can.”

I hung up the phone. I had turned down the radio to talk to your mother and it was silent around me. I sighed again and thought about missing this first. Tonight, I was missing bananas. What would I be missing in the future? School plays? Sports performances? Music recitals? Bedtime baths? Goodnight stories?

I took a deep breath and I imagined these scenarios in my head. I was disappointed but when I thought about how you might be disappointed by me not being there, I felt crushed. I never want to let you down. I never want to let my job interfere with my primary responsibility of being your parent. Yes, my job is important, but being your father is the most important thing I will do in this lifetime. I can reschedule meetings but I can’t reschedule all of these firsts. I’m just going to have to find a way to do a good job at work and do a great job at home. In this new year, that is my resolution.

As my thoughts continued, traffic thinned and my pace picked up. Lights turned green for me as I made my way off the freeway and onto the surface streets to home. Soon enough I pulled into the garage and bounded out of the car and into the house. You were there, strapped into your chairs, while Mommy fed you bananas. I rushed over, picked up a spoon and fed TheMonk a gob of banana. It was not your first taste of banana, TheMonk, but it was one of your first bites. I could tell you liked it. I smiled at you to reassure you that you were eating yummy stuff. You looked up at me and laughed.

I laughed too.

I almost missed bananas. I’m so glad I didn’t.

Love,
Daddy

Not bad. In fact I would go so far as to say pretty good. Maybe even better than pretty good. Impressive? Maybe. You be the judge.

Apparently Swee’Pea felt warm to the new daycare lady (she’s getting over okay, has a cold) so she called me on my cell phone to ask if she could give her Children’s Tylenol. The only problem? I hadn’t yet programmed her phone into my cell and, since I’m not exactly used to getting calls from my daycare provider, I ignored her call (hey, I was in the middle of a very important meeting with 28 eight-year-olds). Oops.

She’s programmed now. It won’t happen again.

(Bri’s good too.)

On Monday we start daycare with our second daycare provider.

What happened to the first? Well, we were concerned when we found out she had five children under the age of one and two more pre-school aged kids and no consistent help. Her license only allows three kids under the age of 2 and six kids total. I feel bad because going with this lady was my idea. I had great recommendations from people who knew her personally and I trusted she was the right fit. I’m still not sure why she told me for months she had room for two infants when clearly she did not. It was a learning experience for this rookie father. I should have asked more questions. I should have looked at more providers. I should have…

Oh well. What’s done is done. Tomorrow we begin again and I can only hope this is the last time we have to switch providers. The kids handle it fine. It’s Daddy that has a little trouble coping with the change.

No… Please… Don’t make me do it!

I’ll change diapers for a week!

I’ll… I’ll… do the laundry for a month!

I just can’t do that!

I… I… don’t have the dexterity in my fingers today.

I’m feeling a little weak today.

I just showered and I don’t want to sweat!

I’m… I’m… not mentally prepared for this!

Oh, Please, Please, Please don’t make me do it today!

PLEASE WOMAN DON’T MAKE ME CHANGE THE SHEETS ON THE CRIBS!

If you know my mother (and since she seems to hand out the web address to this site to everyone she knows, I’m sure you probably do), then you’ll know she’s a… bit… unique. She loves a freezing cold house, will throw away anything of importance lying around the house if it happens to be in her cleaning line of sight, and she leaves messages on my blog that make fun of me.

The final straw was her telling the world that I know the words to every song in the movie Grease. Well, I do. So does every other thirty-something person out there (right? C’mon guys, back me up here). I thought about banning her IP address from the site but she’s sly like a fox and would, no doubt, be knocking down doors in the neighborhood just to get her 4-5x a day habit of TheMonk and Swee’Pea (seriously Mom, I only update once a day at the most). In spite of her antics, I still love my mom and wouldn’t want her to waste away in jail on the account of needing her TheMonk and Swee’Pea fix. On the other hand, it would save a bunch on the nursing home we’ll be sending her to. I hear they even serve whipped cream on their Jell-0!

So, I can’t ban her. But clearly she needs to be kept in check. Now, I know there are probably a lot of big Grandmother fans out there. Some of you, in fact, may be grandmothers yourself. In fact, I am hereby soliciting applications for a replacement grandmother. One that won’t make fun of me on my own blog.

Are you interested in being TheMonk and Swee’Pea’s grandmother? Now, granted, you have a high standard to live up to. TheMonk and Swee’Pea would be naked were it not for the generosity of this woman. But really, what’s the chance she’ll keep this pace up? Is it too much to ask to have her clothe my children until they’re eighteen? You decide. Take a look at the cute pics on the right. You could be TheMonk and Swee’Pea’s grandmother. All applicants will be considered. A thorough background check will be necessary. My only request is you don’t make fun of me on my own blog.

Dear TheMonk and Bri,

This being a father thing is really starting to sink in. You are now well on your way to seven months and I cannot believe how much my life has changed since you were born. This being the new year, it has provided an opportunity to reflect on the past year and all that I see in that reflection is you. In fact, I see you everywhere I look little ones. I see you in the little boy holding his mama’s hand as they cross the street in front of me. I see you in the teenage girl behind the counter at Starbucks. I see you in the fifth-year senior quarterback leading his team to victory. I see you in the preschool kids that run by my office each morning.

You are my world little ones. The promise of your smiles gets me through the day and I never forget how lucky I am to have you in my life. Every night, your mother and I look at each other and remark about how lucky we are to have you both. I cannot imagine my life without you.

As a new father – your father – I’m struck by the awesome responsibility that you present. I feel so humble that I was chosen by some greater being to be your father – to protect you, to nurture you, to love you. I do not take this responsibility lightly and while I’m not entirely sure what comes next I know I’m pretty good at improvising. I try not to let fear of losing you interfere with living our lives. Every day I open the newspaper and read of children being abducted or hit by cars or things so awful I don’t even want to think about it. It is these times where my thoughts are only of how can I keep you safe. I do not have the magic answer but your safety will always be first and foremost on my mind. I also feel comfort in that I’m not alone in this. Your mother and I make a pretty good team and I hope you benefit from that in the years to come.

This parenting thing isn’t easy. In fact, it’s the hardest thing I have ever done. I hope, someday, you will come to understand how much your mother and I love you. I hope you understand that with this kind of love we will have to make decisions that you may not like. We won’t always be popular in our own household. And as much as I hope to be your friend and be the one you look to as you become an adult yourself, I also know that I need to be your father first. This will take some practice. I may not always make the right decision. But I will always be honest with you and tell you why I’m making that decision. My biggest hope is that we will always be able to communicate. A child should always be able to talk to his or her father.

TheMonk and Swee’Pea, you can become anything you want to become. I hope to help you get there. Every day you do something that makes me catch my breath in amazement. I cannot believe that you are my son and you are my daughter. I hope that sense of wonder never goes away. You both deserve a bit of wonder in your lives.

I love you little ones.

Love,
Daddy.